When You've Been Used, Turn Here for Your Next Move

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All of us have likely experienced that feeling or painful realization that we’ve been taken advantage of. Someone isn’t what they said they were, or we’ve fallen prey to fraud.

Sometimes it’s worse. We’ve given years and our best effort to someone who does not appreciate us and has only been using us all along. They’re selfish and we’re their latest victim. Now what?

Turn with me to Gen. 30-31 as Jacob and his two wives realize they must draw a line for their own protection, well-being, and prepare to move on from a very difficult situation.

Gen. 30:25-30. There comes a time to move on, and it’s the right thing to do. Being taken advantage of is not our calling - we’re not door mats. It’s okay to work yourself into a better life.

Jacob made himself invaluable. Give all you have where you are until it’s time to move on. Make your contribution one that will be missed - and worthy of a raise to keep you around!

Gen. 30:31-34. We become more valuable when we prove our worth without seeking handouts (Pro 21:25-26, 5, 13:4). The laborer is worthy of his reward, and God is watching (Eph 6:7-8).

Gen. 30:35-43. Laban selfishly offers Jacob a “fresh start”, space to work his plan, and makes things as difficult as possible! Some people are like that. Work hard, trust God (1 Pet. 2:18-24).

Jacob embarks on a six-year endeavor of trusting God, using acquired skills and ambition that God honors. The blessing comes from the benevolent God, not the “branches” (our own devices).

Gen 31:1-3. When there’s strife in your life look to God - He just might be motivating a move and sending help. Your success attracts critics and envy - even from those who benefit most.

Know this: God sees when you’re being taken advantage of and will reward you for doing right even when others are doing you wrong.

Gen. 31:4-16. Jacob does some things that can help you and discern when God’s making a move:

1) He becomes inwardly motivated and convinced it’s time; 2) circumstances changed in his relationships that got his attention; 3) he heard clear confirmation from God’s word; 4) he consulted with others (his family) and they agreed; 5) the desire to stay was removed; 6) he worked diligently until the move (6 yrs); 7) circumstances permitted his departure, he obeyed.

They have all been victims of Laban’s selfish ways. They’ve all been used enough. Thankfully when others use and abuse us, we have an advocate who sees it all - His name is Jesus (v.12).

Gen. 31:17-21. Jacob knows it’s time to take a big step into God’s repeated promise: I will be with you.

When we realize we’ve been the victims of another’s selfish interests, and have been used long enough, we have an Advocate who sees it all and will help with our next move - His name is Jesus.

Let’s Take the Message Home

1. Consider your present contribution where you live, work, learn, worship, and socialize. Would it be missed? Hard to replace? What can you do to make yourself a better contributor?

2. Look at the 7 things Jacob did to confirm God was making the move, not just Jacob. Where might these be aligning in your life that indicates God might be preparing you for a move?

3. Look at Gen. 31:12. God sees what others are doing to you. Write a note thanking God for seeing and being with you even if moving is not an option. What can you do to make it better?